As a litigator at Smith & Hudson, my salary flattered and exhilarated me, yet nothing I would purchase could soothe my private ghost. What about your dreams? she haunted. Despite skiing vacations in Aspen, Navajo silver and turquoise jewelry, health spas, and clothing boutique binges, the rattle of her questions would not subside. What about the you you wanted to become?

Oh, yeah, that. Too busy this week and next. Pink message mountains and manila file jungles on my desk; yellow Post-its crammed with case citations. Demands. Hours and minutes of my breath. Day after day, I'd scrutinize complaints and briefs until my eyes itched, blurred, then tilted toward the misted blue and white mountains outside my thirtieth floor window. This is my time on earth, I thought. Yet I have to down enough jolts of mocha java just to stay awake.

It’s one of those stories that can help define a life, although the hero of this one says it was just part of a progression. S. Leonard Scheff had already been “messing around with Buddhism for years” when he handled quite a bit of legal work to help facilitate the Dalai Lama’s visit to Tucson, Arizona, in 1993. So, he figures, he was probably already receptive to the message His Holiness presented. At the same time, though, getting that message to hit home took another, less kindly teacher.

2012 Update is here:  http://cuttingedgelaw.com/content/steve-keeva-sad-update